Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Ten Things.

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Today's prompt: Having a positive attitude is important . . . but let’s face it, diabetes isn’t all sunshine and roses (or glitter and unicorns, for that matter). So today let’s vent by listing ten things about diabetes that we hate. Make them funny, make them sarcastic, make them serious, make them anything you want them to be!!

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The Top Ten Reasons I'd Like To Break Up With Diabetes.
  1. Partners should pull their own weight in a relationship, but I'm the one doing all of the heavy lifting, every day. Rude.
  2. You are the most expensive date ever. You're all about wearing the top labels - but that stuff's expensive, dude. An ATM, I am not.
  3. You give me chills; they're multiplying. And sometimes, I lose control. (And not in a good way.)
  4. Wicked, rapid mood swings. Up, down. Back up again. Crashing down. Seriously? Get your crap together.
  5. I can never get a straight answer from you about the future. I mean, you put a ring on it; sure. We've been together for 25 years, so we've got some stability and experience on our side. But I've heard about your other relationships, and you've done some pretty rotten things to people. I can't help but wonder if we'll follow the same road.
  6. When was the last time we cuddled?
  7. I'm always carrying your accessories around for you, and these ginormous purses hurt my shoulders. Gift cards for massages welcome on my next birthday.
  8. Much like Kanye West, you're attention-starved and never seem to stop talking.
  9. You're always like, "Oh, let's try Mexican food again! I love that stuff! I can totally handle it!". And then you're yelling at me about how horrible it was for hours afterwards.
  10. And finally, Diabetes, you hurt me all the time. You're a prick. There. I said it.

28 comments:

  1. Aw. Number 10 was the theme of Caleb's list. Number 6 gave me a chuckle though. Thanks for adding some levity to a heavy topic!

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  2. Like your humorous approach to a not-so-humorous topic...as always :)

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  3. Ah Kim! I KNEW yours would be amazing (I just cathartically vented my poorly pent-up rage).

    5's my fave... no wait... 6... No no! 9.

    Genius. There. I said it.

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  4. Kim - I will be coming back to you list when the others I read today get me down. It made me laugh - I wish we could all break-up with D!

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  5. You're post made my morning..I love it! We are really gonna have to work on finding you a new "significant other"!!

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  6. Kim you said it. "You are a prick". And I am sure there was no pun intended, or was there???

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  7. Great list.Especially loved #9!

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  8. "You give me chills; they're multiplying"-- my girls just watched Grease for the first time (both mom and I cringed at some scenes we'd forgotten about) and then once they learned we had the soundtrack, made us dig it out of cardboard box in the attic. It's still in the van's cd player, sigh.

    For such a difficult topic, this was an absolute joy to read; what an inspiring perspective. One day I hope Lia has the good fortune to meet you.

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  9. Damn Prick needs to get outta your life! :)

    Loved your spin on the list.

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  10. #8
    I'm gonna let you finish your list, but let me just say...

    :D

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  11. Yes!!! Awesome, Kim. This list has got everything, Grease and pop culture references and all! Love it... "When did we cuddle?" Ha ha! Thanks for the laugh.

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  12. Fabulous! 10 hits the nail on the head!

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  13. Hahaha great post as always! :)

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  14. Steve - the pleasure would be mine!

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  15. You're so awesome, and so is this post. Don't think I could love it any more. But I just read it again, and yes, I can. ;)
    @sarahmart

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  16. Great post, Kim! I love your angle on the list...made me laugh!!!

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  17. I Love It, awesome job!! I can't wait till my daughter is old enough to read blogs!! : )

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  18. You are so creative and humorous! Love this list! Thanks for making me smile about stuff I hate. :)

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  19. OMG. This is freakin' hilarious! Love it!

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  20. That. is. awesome. - Your Brother

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  21. Another fabulous effort, dear daughter. Thanks for sharing. Love, Mom

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